“Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” –Luke 22:31-32.
Why does it feel like I am dying?
The short answer—you likely are. But that’s a good thing. Hear me out.
So long as we are here on earth, child of God, your Christian walk will be peppered with seasons when it will feel like you are dying. Why? God is pruning you, transforming and reshaping you into the image and likeness of Jesus, His Son. For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. –Romans 8:29.
God is removing your dead wood—your fleshy bits. Those weak or unproductive areas in your life that siphon your precious time, attention, and focus away from Christ. Those fleshly parts of you that look nothing at all like Jesus. So if God is removing it, let it go! For it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure. –Philippians 2:13. Because even the so-called “good stuff” will be useless where God is preparing to take you, so off with it. Remember, God is far more concerned with your character and eternal good than your comfort
Having experienced this painful process, Peter had firsthand knowledge of this Truth. Yet he was not the first of Christ’s disciples to have been sifted. And he wouldn’t be the last. In fact, each of the Twelve had been—sifted. Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. Within this month, or year, this very day, many of Jesus’s disciples have or will experience the crushing anguish experienced when God permits Satan to sift one of His children.
Will their inner cry and turmoil echo Peter’s, perhaps? “After all Jesus has done for me. All I have witnessed and know Him to be, how could my faith be so weak? How could I fail Him so miserably!?”
And when they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and sat down together, Peter sat down among them. Then a servant girl, seeing him as he sat in the light and looking closely at him, said, “This man also was with him.” But he denied it, saying, “Woman, I do not know him.” And a little later someone else saw him and said, “You also are one of them.” But Peter said, “Man, I am not.” And after an interval of about an hour still another insisted, saying, “Certainly this man also was with him, for he too is a Galilean.” But Peter said, “Man, I do not know what you are talking about.” –Luke 22:55-59.
“I was so sure I’d rather die than deny Jesus by demonstrating so little courage in my hour of testing.”
“Truly I tell you,” Jesus declared, “this very night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” Peter replied, “Even if I have to die with You, I will never deny You.” –Matthew 26:34-35.
Have you been experiencing a time of profound spiritual wrestling, hopelessness, or fear? A time so daunting that your toes, however briefly, drew dangerously close to the line labelled turning away? A moment when the literal fear of God ran through you, icy, jolting, one that left you crying out to God, repenting of your pridefulness and misplaced self-confidence? And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. And Peter remembered the saying of the Lord, how he had said to him, “Before the rooster crows today, you will deny me three times.” And he went out and wept bitterly. –Luke 22:61-62.
Have you ever experienced a dark night of the soul?
Has the very earth beneath your feet suddenly upturned? Where everything you’ve believed and professed was tested, tried, and found wanting?
Or that startling moment of “I am not yet who I will be.” And you find yourself taken aback by the jarring realization you are still very human, contrary to your great faith in Christ. You’ve underestimated your vulnerability and are weak, susceptible to failing, to fall. Beloved friend, have you yet come face-to-face with that moment when it was Jesus, and only Jesus (as it always is), who held you back from a fall from which you’d never get up? I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. –John 10:28-29.
It’s in that place where we find Peter, here where many may find themselves today.
If this is you—If you’re experiencing a dark night of the soul, take heart, Beloved of God, He is still with you. But know this. God allows this crushing, questioning, this desperate time of falling and failing, of testing, to beset you. Just read the Book of Job. In fact, just read verses Eight thru Twelve for confirmation. “Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.” “Does Job fear God for nothing?” Satan replied. “Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. But now stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face.” The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, everything he has is in your power, but on the man himself do not lay a finger.” –Job 1:8-12.
And no, child of God, your Father has not stopped loving you. Neither has God forsaken you. Quite the opposite, His Holy Spirit is refining you. You’re about to level up.
Now notice how today’s scripture verse is so very personal, how God is interceding for you, specifically—as surely and personally as He did for your brother Peter. And though Jesus informed Peter that Satan had asked to sift them all, He also made clear that it was for Peter whom He was praying. Peter had much work to do— and he needed to be spiritually squared away to accomplish all that Jesus had called and equipped him to do. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.”
God is working out your fleshy bits, too, Beloved. Perhaps the sifting you’re experiencing is happening so that, like Peter, you too may be restored, transformed, made new, readied for the next leg of your journey with the Lord. But the jar he was making did not turn out as he had hoped, so he crushed it into a lump of clay again and started over. –Jeremiah 18:4.
Holy Spirit will reveal your weak areas to you so that you might repent of any pridefulness, self-confidence, anything not of God. But, praise His Merciful name! As surely as the Holy Spirit convicts, He also intercedes in our great moments of weakness. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weaknesses. For we do not know how we ought to pray, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. –Romans 8:26-27.
Friend, if you are experiencing a time of change and trials, call out to Jesus. He will come, and with Him, His Holy Spirit, to help walk you through every valley. Romans 10:9-10 assures you of the eternal safety found only in Jesus. If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.
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